Taming the beast

Cheeky monkey girl is better, and much more settled into the new role of big sister this week. Still Daddy's girl, but Mummy is now OK again too.

The pixie monster continues to be a contented little one for now...as well she should, having gained 360 grams in one week.

A mixed blessing of course...because I have mastitis. They think. As in I have a big nasty sore red patch on my right boob and oedema type swelling but no one can find the underlying plugged duct. Am on antibiotics, isn't clearing as well or as quickly as it should so I'm off for an ultrasound tomorrow morning to see what is going on.

Am hoping to get into a day stay clinic after that, as I would like to put a stop to comfort expressing (up to 500 ml a day!) and just be able to feed. I can put up with the overactive letdown (going to be great for public feeding, excuse me while I just pop my baby off and catch the initial torrent with a towel) and the nipple vasospasm (see them go white, blue and red in the cold, ouch)....it's the expressing to ensure that the affected breast isn't too full that is killing me and only making the supply situation worse. That and the fact that we still need to work on attachment. I hate the football hold, and the modified combo football/cradle hold. I want to just be able to do the blissful baby in cradle hold gig. Enough said.

I want to be able to concentrate on family dynamics, practice juggling two kids and actually venture out into the world with mr hissy and the girls.

Sigh.